nsync in black and white

Fiction by Pen . . . . . not real, made up, purely intended for entertainment

No regrets

for Bellamyrose at fic_requests

"We should have done this before," Chris says expansively, leaning back in his chair.

"Go to a gig and get completely lost in the small hours thirty miles from Orlando where nobody ever goes, you mean? End up having breakfast in some restaurant we'll never be able to find again if our lives depend on it?"

"Worked out okay, didn't it? Place may not look like much but somebody in the kitchen can really cook. We can get them to call us a cab when we're through. You want dessert?"

"Oh, twist my arm," said AJ, so they ordered the most irresistible of the pies on the grubby menu and sat back contentedly. The waitress refilled their coffees and went back to the kitchen. "It is kinda nice not being recognized."

"Do you ever regret being famous?" Chris asked, curiously. That had a more heartfelt ring to it than he'd expected.

"Being famous? No, not for a second. You?"

"Nah. I only regret the stuff I didn't do."

AJ considered. "I regret losing entirely too much of my life to mindlessness, you know, when I was."

"Hmm. I think that counts as stuff you didn't do. I mean, yeah, the drinking and the drugs, I went a way down that path myself, and it wasn't—when it gets like that, it's not drinking for pleasure or taking stuff for fun, it's hiding from your life. Was for me, anyhow."

"I guess."

"And what I'm doing now, I could have been doing that before, instead of wasting my time getting, uh, wasted. So I count that as not doing stuff, so it's okay to regret that, because what we didn't do was live our lives."

AJ thought about it. "Yeah, makes sense," he said, and drank some more coffee. "So, what do you regret not doing?"

Chris grinned. "I kinda wish, sometimes... I mean, Lance has a great ass, or he did, before he got all ripped and shit."

AJ's eyebrows would have been very special indeed if they could have reached his hairline, but they made a valiant effort. "You wanted to do Lance?"

Chris waggled his head. "Maybe."

"Maybe it's not too late. You could give him a call."

"Nah... he's all. Huh. See, it would have been fine back then when we just thought he was gay, he didn't have a clue what he was doing. Now, he's this big gay prize with dozens of ridiculously handsome boyfriends, and I'm not actually sure I could take the competition, and it'd be, well, I wouldn't want to be, I mean, I've never actually done anything with guys. Which is why I put it on my list of regrets."

"Don't want to be the fumbling virgin," AJ said sapiently, and Chris couldn't argue. At least, he hadn't had quite enough coffee yet to make the effort.

"Besides," Chris said, "it would have been kinda... incestuous. Well, not exactly, but you know what I mean."

"Not something I ever thought about," AJ said.

"Oh, don't give me that crap. Seriously, didn't you ever think about it, with any of your guys?"

"Thought about it... never said anything, but I can't say I regret it. I mean, Nick would have freaked completely. Howie had enough with the rumors, used to make him awful crotchety. Kevin, hmm, but he got married a long time ago, and he wouldn't. Or Brian."

"You're a domestic lot, you Boys," Chris remarked. "Ooh, pie." Their desserts arrived, and were even better than the bacon and eggs (and everything else) had been, so there was happy, munchy silence for a while. "Whereas mine mostly haven't settled down."

"Just Joey."

"Yeah," said Chris, frowning, "and I always wondered if he and Lance, I mean, all those nights on their bus, after they kicked Steve off. I'm just saying."

"Jealous?" AJ grinned evilly.

"Eh. Not exactly. It's more like, there's this whole side of sex that I'm not getting, and it's not like I go for guys, it's just, you wonder, don't you, what it'd be like."

They finished their pies. The waitress brought more coffee.

"So," said AJ, "does the guy have to have a great ass, or what? Because you were definitely right about Lance, he did, only I don't think I can compete with that."

Chris stared at him.

"Well," AJ said, reasonably, "we're both curious, so why not? Unless you wanna keep hold of your regrets."

"Oh, hell," said Chris. "No regrets. Let's get that cab."


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